Dealing With Teen Bullying
Helping Your Teenager Deal With Mean Kids
Your teenager wants to be independent; he or she certainly does not want to come home crying to you about a mean boy or girl that has been acting in a nasty way. But the words of a bully sting hard, at times even making your teenager want to stay in bed and avoid school. What as parents of teens can we do to help?
Reasons for Bullying
Why is your teen being picked on? Often social status, ethnicity, dating preferences or something as simple as the wrong brand of jeans can play a part, but for a bully no one is immune from the insensitive behavior. Identifying the reason for the bullying doesn't always help in finding solutions, though-- your child should not have to change his or her personality to fit into a social situation.
Types of Teen Bullying
With the onslaught of media available to teens today, bullying isn’t just happening on the asphalt at school anymore, but in fact is proliferating on the computer and cell phone screens of teens everywhere. Cyberbullying is the term used to describe the often-anonymous method of picking on a teen via the internet or text messaging.
Dominic Cappello, author of Ten Talks Parents Must Have with Their Children About Violence states, “Cyberbullies do what they like because there's less restraint online than there could ever be offline. Kids hide out in cyberspace and do their worst. They can spread a rumor around school (or in between schools) within minutes by text, IM, or cell. This changes the dynamic of how kids interact. They can be really nasty because they don't have to deal with the ramifications of their behavior.” (Cyberbullying, Parenting Teens, August 2007)
How to Deal With the Bully
Parents need to be aware of the school policies on dealing with bullying before it happens. Teens learn from the behaviors they’ve seen at home as well as from watching the behavior of other teens how to make good choices in response to bullying. The old mantras of ‘walk away’ or ‘ignore the bully’ can work in some situations, though some are more complicated and require adult intervention by either the parent or the school..
Parents Can Help
The National Education Association offers comprehensive online information for parents on how to deal with bullying when it’s happening to their teen. Being supportive by inviting your teen to talk when their mood seems poor is always a good idea. If your teenager has a supportive environment at home he or she will have better self-esteem and will be more likely to be able to handle negative external behavior.
Bullying is never an easy issue to deal with for teens or their parents. Sticking together as a strong, healthy family unit is the best defense against this inevitable, difficult issue.
Read about dealing with difficult teens, teen stereotypes, and texting your teen.
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