Parent Guide for Alcohol and Drug Free Children
Parenting for Raising Positive, Healthy, Happy, Drug Free Children
The Prevalence of Drugs
One of the most critical factors destroying children today is alcohol and drug abuse. It is a social malady contributing to crime, rape, academic underachievement, sexual behavior, addiction, and numerous health, mental health and emotional disorders.
Although eighth, tenth, and twelfth graders across the country have shown a substantial decline in drug use since the mid-1990s, the rates for the three grades for illicit drug use are still 13 percent, 28 percent, and 36 percent. Although substantially lower, the levels of intoxication for youth are still too high with 18 percent of the 10th graders admitting to drunkenness within the past month, and 29 percent of 12th graders admitting drunkenness according to the 2007 Monitoring the Future Survey conducted by the University of Michigan.
This is one area where parents need to be pro-active in raising children. Here, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Too many parents have visited children in jails, hospitals or psychiatric clinics and confessed their ignorance – they did not know what their children were doing.
How to Help Children Stay Drug Free
A child's best defense against harmful or inappropriate behavior is a loving and supportive family. Here are several ways that parents can help build a strong foundation for drug-free children:
- Show love and affection to children. Give lots of hugs.
- Parents should act as a personal model of the kind of life and behavior expected from children. Be a role model, and remember that the vast majority of adults do not smoke, use illegal drugs, or are heavy drinkers - in fact, one-third of Americans are total abstainers, and another major percentage are light or infrequent drinkers. Children are likely to copy parent’s self-destructive behavior (one study showed that 81% percent of parents who drink have children who drink, but 72% of parents who don’t drink have children who don’t drink.)
- Set expectations and be sure to involve children in setting clear household rules, and in the consequences for breaking those rules.
- Remind children frequently and openly of the family's “disapproval of use” attitude toward alcohol, tobacco or other drug use.
- Be sure a child knows that he or she can talk with a parent, regardless of what he or she has done.
- Allow children opportunities to show responsibility and encourage children to get involved in positive, constructive activities, and be sure to give recognition for their achievements.
- Teach positive values such as honesty, fairness, respect for others and the law, and use “Teachable Moments" to assist learning.
- Spend special time with each child, and occasionally alone if possible. Make time for fun activities. Stay involved. Parental involvement is one of the most important protective factors for youth.
- Teach children to "Say No". Peer pressure and media pressure are powerful influences. Teach resistance skills, and help children develop a plan to avoid or escape places where they may be pressured to drink or use drugs.
- Provide consistent spiritual guidance. Religion is another powerful protective factor.
Talking is Key
How does one talk to kids about alcohol, tobacco and other drugs? According to the Partnership for a Drug-Free America, do not worry about how to start the discussion and do not get discouraged if it seems children are not listening. Many youth said later in life that it was the advice and concern of their parents that kept them from alcohol, tobacco or drugs! A parent cannot begin talking with children too soon, and as long as it is not badgering or threatening one cannot do it too often.
Use those “teachable moments.” Make one thing crystal clear: alcohol, tobacco and other drugs are dangerous, and it is not acceptable that children use them!
For Further Reading
National Institute on Drug Abuse: Preventing Drug Abuse Among Children and Adolescents
Happy Children
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