Reducing Bullying of Teenagers at School
A Team Approach Helps Fend off Overly Aggressive Behavior
Apr 14, 2009
It is highly likely your teenage son or daughter will experience being the victim of bullying by his or her peers during adolescence. Certain traits are found to be true for victims of bullying, however some myths about bullies themselves are being found to be untrue. Regardless, the most effective approach to reducing the behavior is a concerted effort between parents, teachers and schools.
The Roles of Bully and Victim
Peter Smith writes in The Psychology of Education [Routledge Press, 2003] that more than 80% of teenagers will experience the effects of bullying by either participating as an aggressor or asa victim. Both roles carry certain psychological impacts which eventually will have negative outcomes.
Victims of bullying tend to share certain personality traits. They are generally anxious and insecure, cautious and quiet in their actions and tend to have strong relationships with their parents. Victims have a higher risk of developing emotional problems such as depression, clinical anxiety and poor concentration and performance in school.
Bullies, meanwhile, do not seem to match the long held myth they are insecure or anxious themselves. In fact, Smith reports, bullies tend to have relatively strong feelings of satisfaction and contentment with life. However, they suffer as they enter the adult world and lose their associated bullying friends. Alone, they face levels of anxiety and confusion leading to a number of problematic emotional states.
Stopping Bullying Behavior
If your child is being bullied, that is to say, being the victim of his peers' aggression or aggravation, parents must take action. The situation does not resolve itself and go away. Because children tend to have the same associates for long periods of time as they progress through class levels, patterns of the behavior of the group tend to stay stable.
Parents can help in three ways. First, the parents should talk to the parents of the children who are exhibiting aggression. Although this process can be difficult, direct intervention has a higher impact. By making it clear to the bully's parents that one is aware of his or her child's behavior, it puts the bully's family network on alert for the behavior. The bully's parents will most likely have words with or discipline the bully for the behavior.
Secondly, parents can be helpful in reducing bullying by going to the teachers responsible for supervising the children during the part of the day the bullying took place. Teachers have very busy workloads and may have overlooked the behavior or not thought it was a serious condition. By expressing clearly to the teacher one's expectations of the behavior stopping, parents have elevated the chances for intervention.
Finally, parents can have a positive impact by seeking out the parents of other children who are experiencing bullying. By forming an informal coalition, parents can report changes in their children's experiences to each other. This association also makes for a stronger voice when lobbying the school's administration for intervention acts, such as bully prevention programs now widely available.
Bullying has negative effects for adolescents. Victims experience increased chances of depression and increased anxiety. Bullies themselves experience a reinforced pattern of anti-social behavior which will not serve them well in adulthood. Parents can help reduce bullying by active advocacy for their son or daughter with the parents of the bully, teachers involved, and by forming coalitions with other parents.
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