Spotting Signs of Pre-Runaway Children and Teens
Awareness and Fast Response to a Missing Child Aids in a Safe Return
Jun 20, 2009
According to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, 2000 children are reported missing every day. When runaway children are very young, they usually head for the woods behind the home or to a friend's house and return home by dinner or bedtime. Missing teens, especially missing girls, are a much more serious problem.
Fortunately, there are signs that parents can look for to determine if children are planning on running away, and there is a proven set of actions that parents can take in the event that a child actually goes missing.
Behavior Changes
The parent may have little or no warning, especially during the turbulent early teen years when communication has been shut off or there has been a major change in the family like a death, divorce or remarriage. Signs of discontent will be displayed such as lack of interest in schoolwork or plummeting grades, withdrawal, depression, and sudden anger. Here are some signs to look for:
- When children start overeating or a sudden loss of appetite.
- Either constant sleeping or never sleeping.
- Avoiding family members and friends.
- When they get a new group of friends.
- Staying closed-up in their room.
- Getting involved with strange religious groups or with cults.
- An increase in rebellious and argumentative behavior.
In some cases teens will hint about running away or threaten to do so, or a family may hear rumors through friends or school. In addition, many runaways will make arrangements by gradually accumulating funds withdrawn from a bank account, or keep a stash of clothes somewhere in the house. Without anger or fear, confront the child with all suspicions. Parents should discuss their concern and their child's view of the situation.
How to React When Children Run Away
If it's known that the child left home of her own accord instead of by abduction, the first step is to check with acquaintances. Friends, relatives and neighbors may know or have seen something, and employers, co-workers and school staff should be questioned. Make sure they know to call if they hear from the child. Look at places the child frequents. If the parents are divorced, notify the other parent, and don't forget to check hospitals and bus and train stations.
Searching For Clues
Oftentimes, children leaves behind many clues as to their whereabouts. Check their room. Look for letters, maps, or notes that may indicate what their plans were. Determine if any clothing, pictures or money is missing. If applicable, check their bank accounts and phone bills for a pattern of long-distance calls. Look at their computers and discs. Email, chat, and instant messages can hold many clues.
Notifying the Police
When notifying the police do not say that the teenager has run away. State only that he is missing. If they know the child left by choice, they may not mobilize the same resources as they would for a kidnapping, and by the time they do, the trail may have grown cold. Provide to the police:
- Photographs of the child and some information about her.
- The names and contact numbers of all friends, acquaintances, and relatives.
- The places the child goes regularly.
- Any ideas or suspicions regarding possible destinations and who else may be involved.
Call the National Runaway Switchboard (1-800-621-4000). They will take a message for the child. By becoming familiar with these guidelines, a parent will be prepared to handle runaway children and teens in a calm and thorough manner, thereby helping to return a runaway boy or runaway girl home safely.
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